Friday, December 31, 2010

Three Gifts This New Year

Christmas has come and gone.
Family has come and gone.
Traveling has come and gone.

And now it's me again... me and Him... And we've had a lot of time to talk lately...

Not because life has slowed down all that much (does life ever really slow down with four small treasures running around? :)... But I have felt drawn to him lately... drawn to His presence... Drawn to His peace...

I've asked Him what He would want this year for me to be about... And to be honest, nothing profound has captured my thoughts.

But one thing I keep finding myself coming back to... one thing that seems to keep taking over my thoughts as I do the dishes, as I dress the kids... and everyone's running wild looking for something other than the one thing that I asked them to look for which is usually the inevitable lost shoe... the one thing that I want to find myself lost in in this upcoming year...

Giving...

Giving not of monetary things... but giving of myself. Giving of my heart, even if (or especially if) the giving might force me to be vulnerable, or cause me to be stretched, or ask me to sacrifice, or lead me into humility...

So this year... for me...

Instead of a list of often unattainable resolutions...

I have three gifts... gifts that I would like to give... consistently, with joy, without reservation or fear, whole-heartedly, and with humble trust in the one who made me solely for His glory.

The first gift is for my children... To them I would like to give the gift of strong words.... Words that are helpful for building others up. Words that strengthen their hearts. Words that encourage them to be brave. Words that bring life to their souls. Words that bless and do not tear down. Words that live out the quiet, gentle Spirit of their passionate, loving heavenly Father.
This year I pray that the Lord would give me ample opportunity to choose wisely the words that come out of my mouth. I pray that He would give me restraint when anger falls on the tip of my tongue and I'm tempted to let harsh words pass through my lips. This year I pray that my words would be filled with kindness and compassion. (Ephesians 4:29-32)
This Lord, by your grace, is the gift that I would like to give my children.

And the second is for my Joey... It's personal, but oh so real...
It's vulnerable, deeply submerged trust.
It's my heart authentically, sincerely, believing you when you tell me with your words that I'm beautiful.
It's me trusting your love even when I am insanely aware of my faults and I can hear the enemy creeping into my thoughts and telling me that I'm not good enough for such a caring, kind & selflessly loving man as you.
It's us, moving forward into an unknown future without being overtaken by fear of failure. When we do life together with Christ as the third (and strongest) strand in our rope of three, there's no such thing as failure... only hope.

Finally the third, for my Savior... To him it would be contentment with joy... whether on the beach or in the mountains, in an apartment or on a farm, eating steak or canned soup, feeling close or far apart... whether he gives generously or takes it all away... no matter the circumstance... I want to choose to be genuinely and joyfully content... for contentment, like love... is a choice, not a feeling. I may not always feel in love, but I can choose to love anyway. I may not always feel content, but I can choose contentment despite what I feel. In a world so often run off feelings, this has been (and still is) a challenge for me. But nothing is impossible with you Lord.

And so, this year...
for me its giving...
giving whole-heartedly,
vulnerably,
generously,
without any reservations.

A most Happy New Year to you and yours!!!