We made it to CA... It was the longest trip ever! Our, used-to-be, happy go lucky little boy, turned into a crying/ whining mess just outside The Springs and kept it up, off and on, nearly the entire trip. By 10pm, it was an (unofficial) affirmative, NO MORE children, we are sooo done with the baby phase... well... for today at least! :) Geezaloo!!!
The next morning we felt a bit refreshed and Grandpa Dale went all out with a giant farmer's breakfast... eggs, bacon, hash brown potatoes with onions and peppers, smothered in ketchup... DE-licious!!! The kids woke up wide-eyed to gigantic candy-filled, toy-filled Easter baskets. They were a hit!
As I sat at the breakfast bar and we chatted and I watched him flip the bacon on the skillet, I couldn't help but think about him all alone up in this place. Think about him and Mom and the way they would have been laughing in the kitchen together, chitchatting about the garden out back... every other word, them calling each other "sweetie". It was like one of those weird movies where you can see clear as day two people standing in the kitchen but then the film fades into a new scene and you realize that the second person was never really there to begin with... it was really just the first person in vivid remembrance.
I love being with him. It's just that, well, when I'm with him, Grandpa Dale, all I can do is think of her, his bride of three short years. They were both the happiest that I had ever seen. A real couple... so in love you could see it on the outside. It just makes you wonder. Wonder why God makes some of the choices that He does. And after ten years I still find myself on this heart journey, this constant seeking of contentment in the only thing that I know to be true, that He gives and takes away.
AS we ate breakfast together, I saw his eyes smiling at my kids. They were cracking jokes at the table up against the window, eating eggs in between giggles. He didn't have to say it, it was just written all over his face, he was soaking up every minute of his time with us... and I was loving the view.
The last time that we were at Grandpa Dale's desert house it was late Fall and all plant life was non-existent. Now that it's well into to Spring the trees and flowers around Mom's memorial stone are green and full. And on the north side of the house is this amazingly stunning rose bush that is covered in these gorgeous yellow roses.
My Mom loved roses. In fact she simply loved gardens.
And when I saw those roses all in bloom, I could feel my throat constricting and the water flooding my eyes and creeping down my face.
Man, how I miss her.
Man, how much she would be in love with these roses.
Man, how I wish with all my heart that she really was standing in that kitchen with Grandpa Dale, flipping the bacon , calling him sweetie.
I was so grateful for the stop off in the desert.
The next day we pulled into my hometown. We rolled down our windows and a warm 80 degrees blew our hair as we drove down the coast.
We're here... And I'm soaking up every minute of it. :)