Sunday, January 25, 2009

Let your 'yes be yes' and your 'no be no'...

Do you ever want a "take back"... You know, when you say something that you know needed to be said but then once it's said you have to follow through simply because you said it... and if you don't follow through then your word no longer means anything and your children quickly learn that you don't mean what you say, and all those hours of training them in "first time obedience" seems to go out the window just because of that one time that you felt to lazy, or maybe too heart broken to follow through... ??? Does this ever happen to you??

It happened to me today with my Siah... He has been majorly struggling with whining and complaining when he doesn't get what he wants... Last night I told him that if he decided to complain about where we were going, what we were doing, or what we were eating then he would not get the privilege of participating.... I reminded him again this morning of what would happen if he decided to complain. He was doing great but on our way home from church he asked, "what are we having for lunch?" I told him and he began his whole whining routine, "But I wanted a peanut butter sandwich"... and the tears started to fall...

I was so bummed... not really because of his whining, (cuz that's just another life lesson that I know we will get through someday if we stay consistant in teaching him other ways to express what he wants or needs) but because i knew that i would have to stick to my word. And for some reason this time, in this situation, this consequence was very difficult for my heart to follow through with...
But one gift that I want to give my kids is the stability of knowing that I am true to my word... I want my 'yes to be yes" and my "no to be no." I want them to know that I mean what I say and I say what I mean...

For that reason I quickly interrupted his carrying on and told him that unfortunately he would now have nothing for lunch because he chose to complain... at the drive up window I ordered one cheese burger for Hal and nothing else...Siah carried on some more, so I told him that not only would he not have lunch but he would receive discipline when we got home... He immediately dried his tears and remained quiet in the back seat until we got home... when we walked through the door I followed through with the discipline and then sent him upstairs to take a nap... without lunch... My heart sank...


When he woke up from his nap I was blessed with this incredible confirmation that sticking to my original word was a good choice... When Siah came down stairs the first thing he said was, "Mom, Siah no whine about me's dinner."
Then, he didn't come right out and say that he was sorry, but he leaned in and let his body melt into my arms and I knew by his actions that his heart had surrendered and that not only was he aware of what he had done wrong, but he had genuine remorse...

At dinner tonight he thanked me for his food before he even began eating... and there was absolutely NO whining!
Thank you Lord for helping me to stick to my word even when EVERY thing inside of me wanted to back down!

I'm learning your Word Lord...slowly yes... but You ARE a FAITHFUL teacher...and for that I am grateful...

Blessing upon blessing...