For when I forget that we're trying to do more than just make it through.
For the times when I look at them and wonder just how the Lord saw it fit for me to have FIVE of these treasures live this one crazy life with me day after day.
Sometimes I find myself trying to turn these kids into who I think they should be, forgetting that Their Maker has already made them into exactly what they ought to be, all for His glory.
It may seem silly, but I read this stuff to my kids. It's soo much easier for me to write what I'm thinking than to say what I'm thinking. And yet there's so much I want them to know. So I bring them here, to this little space.
The Lord has given me something specific in each of my kids. And I want them to know what a gift they are.
My Siah, he's my helper. He gets it done. He's an early riser. And more often than not, by the time I have gotten myself out of bed, this boy has emptied the dishwasher, picked up the living room, put the laundry away, and read his Bible. Sometimes he even feeds the baby and has a cup tea all ready for me on the table by the couch. He's the one who loads the car, and scrapes the snow off the windshield when we have somewhere to go. He's the one that fixes the things that are broken and reminds me of the schedule and what we'er supposed to be doing at what time. He's my right-hand man. He's my help. I'm so grateful for this boy.
My Hal, she's my nurturer. Truthfully, all our kids are caring, but my Hal, she has a special gift in this department. The way Siah is the first to notice what needs doing and gets it done, my Hal is the first to notice what's going on in my heart. She's the one who asks me if I'm feeling okay, the one who brings me a blanket when I'm cold, the first to hug me when she sees the tears running down my cheeks. She can't help it, she just notices the heart stuff. Through my Hal, the Lord has blessed me with an innocent, childlike girl to tangibly tend to my heart. Not because she has to, but because that's just the way He made her. I'm so grateful for this girl.
My Reese, she's my laughter. There has not been a single day since the day that girl was born , that she has not made me laugh. She says the most hilarious things, she does the most hilarious things. She tells jokes and doesn't even realize that she's being funny. She does crazy dances, makes funny faces, and she never fails to come up with the most out-landish ideas. Her and I were in the bathroom one morning. I was wiping breakfast off of her sweet little face. I gently brushed my hand against her cheek and felt a slightly raised little bump. She must have felt me brush over it because she said,
"Mom, did you feel that?"
"Yes," I said, "Do you know what that is?" I asked her.
"Yep," she said it as matter-of-factly as any little girl could say it... "It's a boob."
I burst into laughter.
Her face remained serious.
"You know Mom, a boob."
"Oh sweet girl, not quite. It's a freckle."
"A what ?" She said. "A freckle? Now that's a funny word Mom."
"Not nearly as funny as you thinking it was a boob."
Without a doubt, this girl, she brings the joy into this farmhouse. I'm so thankful for this girl.
My Jed, he's my encouragement. He's probably the most outwardly loving of them all. He's a hugger. And he's always the first to build me up with his words. If you ever need to go jean shopping or bathing suit shopping, take my Jed with you! His genuine, heart-felt words will make you feel like a super model, even after you've birthed seven children and are covered in bright purple stretch marks. And even if you make the most disgusting dinner on the planet, this boy will thank you over and over again and tell you that you just might be the best cook in the world. I had my hair in a scraggly bun on top of my head this morning and Jed came into the living room for a moment and looked at me, "Mom, I really like what you've done with your hair this morning." I mean gosh, what Mama couldn't use a little encourager in their lives. I just love this boy.
And as for Solomon, he's my peace. When my little world feels just a bit too overwhelming, I sneak that little guy into my room and close the door, and we hang out on my bed and it doesn't take long to get him laughing. His contagious smile turns my frown upside down. He's got the best laugh and the most peaceful Spirit. He's beyond chill. He rarely cries. And those big brown eyes just make me giddy. I am so in love.
The Lord has been so kind in giving me each one of these amazing kids. I can write all this down here in this place. And I really do see and believe these things about each of them in my heart. But that doesn't mean that I don't often forget. That doesn't mean that I don't sometimes find myself annoyed at frivolous things, things that don't really matter. Things like the fact that somehow the one and only hairbrush seems to disappear every single night and I can NEVER find it when I need it. Or those soaking wet towels left on the kitchen floor, {how the bath towels got into the kitchen is an unexplainable farmhouse mystery.}You know, stuff like that.
I write in this place because I want to remember...
Because on the days when the farmhouse gets to loud and snippy, petty and sometimes plain old overwhelming...
I want to chase that laughter around around until we're both a heap of happy tears on the living room floor.
I want to endlessly thank the helper.
I wanna hug that nurturer long,
I wanna lavish sweet words on the encourager,
And I want to soak up all that peace!
